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Showing posts from 2014

focusing in: fairytale amongst the abyss

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"That Moment of your life when you have one foot in a fairytale and one in the abyss"  It's at the base, in the valleys, where all you see is the depths of hope and the longing for a prayer to be answered, that if you're not careful you will get stuck - right where he wants you; the enemy of your soul! It's cold. It's dark & all you can see is the unanswered prayers before you. Its almost crippling. But light shines through. You occasionally get glimpses of something beyond. You know there's got to be more! You long for that fairytale to unfold, and so you continue through the climb and as you catch glimpses of HIS beauty and God's creation: it gives you hope! He gives you views of what He is up to, and boy it is good. As the journey continues, to live in a constant tug-o-war between the two takes patience and perseverance. Don't get stuck looking down for too long, you may never see what he has past the horizon! He has plans for m

unmoved. unwavering.

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"it's like sunshine and whiskey..."  the song fades out and the morning DJ segues into the next song on her playlist " So cannot wait for this concert, nonetheless a sold out show at Red Rocks folks, but if you'll be there be sure to swing on by and say hi... Now h ere's Jason Aldean with "Burnin'it down" ( prelude to the song begins and her thoughts start to run their own course)  ... A beautiful morning and the sun has peaked through the clouds enough to the feel the warmth through the windshield.  As she drives to meet her friend over coffee; she cannot wait to see her long-time friend visiting from outta town!  While she drives along her mind scrolls through a series of comments and jumbled conversations from just days before.  Not all in the same order, but recalling things spoken and shared with various people, action taken/or the lack of action taken, and a million and one other thoughts that she could have said, should have said,

its not too late...

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"Write till your fingers bleed tell stories till your voice runs out  because it was WHAT YOU WERE MADE TO DO! Mother or not Woman or not Because it fills you- Because you love it- Because it helps people- Because you're YOU when you do it- Everyone of us has been created ON purpose FOR a purpose! . . . You've been called to do something to shape this world we live in! You've been called and created by a holy God and this world needs you! It's about SO much more than gender! You might want to give up your calling because you're scared out of your mind, or because people might think you're crazy?!  Because you don't think you'll live up to your parents legacy...   What are we gonna do?!? If we left the world-changing,                          the storytelling,                                     the songwriting,                                                 and the movement making  to the         

....I HAD to tell them

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With a sigh of relief and some held back tears, I write this to say; I did not take the offer.   I HAVE to go with the peace, and here's why… They say: You stumble upon your calling when your burdens collide with your passions!   While I am passionate about fitness and stinkin love to work out ( my friends know me best, I travel with a jump-rope in my suitcase and often bring DVDs when I know Im not close enough to a gym if its mid-winter ) But I look at fitness and I just know it will always be part of my life. I'm committed to it and whether I teach or Coach or just train to run a fun race; I will ALWAYS be looking for a great workout with good jams!  And for me, at this point; my workout of choice is Orangetheory (yes its similar to a Crossfit like following. Heck, did you know 17,000 people do Orangetheory fitness workouts a day in the US?!?! But I assure you its not a cult!! ;)  So while I may be passionate about fitness, I already know; this is not my life-lo

hope bubbles

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I sat in the front seat of my car tears streaming down my face as I talked.  I was sharing with a girlfriend well into the midnight morning hours the depth of brokenness and hurt I've experienced in relationships past and reflected on reasons perhaps of treading lightly or wanting to protect my heart for a number of things.  As she sat and listened, I described a couple of the rather tragic breakups I've endured and shed light on a few other 'wrong fits' that still have contributed to me becoming the woman I am today (and Im still filled with optimism and hope!)   She and I were talking through some of the reasons we shy away from certain "types" of guys and then perhaps some of the reasons we're attracted to another type of guy.  As I thought of the relationship that had me sidelined and utterly shocked by an uncourageous breakup over the phone, with 3000 miles and thousands of questions over what happened between us, I would never know. This was b

despite what billboards tell you

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You see, we live with this false illusion that if only our makeup was perfect we were thin or pretty enough, then we'd somehow gain acceptance in the world and life would suddenly start to make sense, come together, maintain control. (Yeh right.  Nice fairytale, huh?!) And yet when  all is said and done and "perfect enough"  there still seems to be a screaming loud hole in the depth of one's soul  that somehow doesn't fill the void; and you find yourself longing...  Longing to believe the truth when people say "they will still love you for you, no matter what size you are," meanwhile the billboards, magazine covers, movies and ads by the thousands dont lie.  At least in your mind they dont.  They all scream the "ideal" female. But what digital artists, marketing geniuses and hollywood failed to clue you in on was that every ad, billboard or magazine cover has been airbrushed and countoured to just that 'perfect look.'  It's impo

Friends with Atheists

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If I were to take bits and pieces from different people I've surrounded my life with to become a better woman today Im sure I would hope parts of what made me ME would come from amazing teachers, mentors and writers I've been challenged by as an adult; but I would also like to think I am who I am from the direct influence of some absolutely amazing women in my life. Some of them I dont see all to often, and some I am blessed to see every few weeks. Today's post I share with you comes all the way from Sydney, Australia.  (No, it's not an entry from a sweet new adventure of mine, although I hope to write on location from Sydney at some point ;))  Today's post is from a dear friend of mine who I have been fortunate enough to know for what seems like a lifetime.    A college roomie, a partner in crime, a fellow adventurer and dreamer, this girl is not only an amazingly talented artist and sick graffiti artist too, but she's a published author, a styl