They Call Me Blondie

In a book Im reading called "The Healing Path" by Dan Allender, he writes: Life is captivity littered with the disappointment and partially satisfied yearning: captivity to a body that does not work as we wish; captivity to a heart that longs for freedom to truly love, to worship from the depths of our being and does not; captivity to the particulars of our culture, race, socioeconomic history, and era, when we would rather be radical, world-conscious Christians...But in every arena of life, I LONG to burst free of the constraints of my flesh, soul, and world …"  He continues to write, knowing it is not us or ourselves individually who can actually burst free from the constraints of our flesh, soul, or world.  It actually takes an act of God and his power giving us the ability to break free from a life that so easily entangles, and with a hope of tomorrow, its by HIM that we are able to move forward - with HIS help. Each and every step of the way. " To ...

I find myself driving and oops there i go... headspin... I'm suddenly back to where I was, oh, 2yrs ago. 6mos ago. 8 DAYS ago. Again. Except this time its with a NEW view and a DIFFerent tune. Waiting. Awesome. Isnt it? I find myself asking "Lord, did i hear you the first time?"or in a bewildered state;  I hesitate.  And meditate  to formulate the words—  and then....   release. ahhhh.  ....and I, I cannot bring more to the tip of my tongue to rattle off some religious prayer  or words like its what You wanna hear  and i s..s..stutter through because i feel like I have no words left to utter a glimpse into the wreckage and turmoil I'm in.. I have. no. words.  God. I need a revelation!  I just really want to know if your near me;  Lord Do you hear me?! And so I'm stuck.  I keep driving. and thinking.  and processing.  Lingering....  My heart is overwhelmed a...

God = Is = Able. Any way you add it up. This is something we can know for certain in our hearts in regard to any and every impossible situation we’re facing. It is something we can keep turning our lives toward with confidence every minute of every day. Any day. Like today. He can do it. He is able. That’s the truth. Bank on it. I know this to be true and yet when my heart is broken into a thousand pieces and the tears flood my eyes, I struggle to lift my head. "Lift your head up princess if not the crown fall" as a popular post on Pinterest has been seen. There's another circling picture of a girl and a crown sliding forward and soooo many of us can relate. You are not alone. Ohh, to take away the pain from last month's devastation. To replace those moments of anger with conflict management and the "right choice of words" so I didn't lose my job. Having not gone home to pick up the lunch you forgot, only to confront the infidelity. ...

It was a week of unbelievable crazy ups and downs.   I heard the exciting news of something I once proposed to be a divinely inspired idea and the not so exciting announcement to me was that it was finally coming to fruition based off someone else's hand - and they took credit. Backhanded high five.  Awesome feeling. A car accident not based off my lack of attention, but it simply was black ice I could not get my car to stop.  A deductible later. Whats another $500 right? The announcement of their wedding. Its clear he moved on. But why would it be on the date of her birthday?   He still isnt allowed home to see his family and has had such a good long stride of behavior.  His wife is devastated.  How to be a good friend in the midst of other struggles, job issues, things I couldnt control, and not to mention sleep I hadn't gotten... I had no idea!  While the devil may have thought he was winning certain battles, and at times during this week ...

With a sigh of relief and some held back tears, I write this to say; I did not take the offer.   I HAVE to go with the peace, and here's why… They say: You stumble upon your calling when your burdens collide with your passions!   While I am passionate about fitness and stinkin love to work out ( my friends know me best, I travel with a jump-rope in my suitcase and often bring DVDs when I know Im not close enough to a gym if its mid-winter ) But I look at fitness and I just know it will always be part of my life. I'm committed to it and whether I teach or Coach or just train to run a fun race; I will ALWAYS be looking for a great workout with good jams!  And for me, at this point; my workout of choice is Orangetheory (yes its similar to a Crossfit like following. Heck, did you know 17,000 people do Orangetheory fitness workouts a day in the US?!?! But I assure you its not a cult!! ;)  So while I may be passionate about fitness, I already know; this is not...

Absolutely loved stumbling across a response to Qideas question : Constraint and Consent, Career and Motherhood and I found myself resonating with things the writer blogged about, but also thinking while reading " What the heck? But Im NOT in my twenties any longer and Im still there! Its not like Im 24 trying to find a purpose and a place in life, God!"  Im into my 30s and thankfully I know things that stirr passion and things that keep me dreaming or awake at night, but for me, now its more of the struggle with the sheer abundance of possibilites to do with life. The challenge as Kate quotes Kathleen Norris  "...the human paradox is that we find these things by starting where we are, not where we wish we were." In an effort to seek out my calling, as I wait to begin a family, I too often time find myself going in circles with the questions of which direction to turn my journey towards and how do I do that while walking in His plan and will, but also not...

You have been And You will be You have seen And You will see You know when I rise and when I fall When I come or go, You see it all You hung the stars and You move the sea, And still You know me And nothing is hidden from Your sight Wherever I go, You find me And You know every detail of my life And You are God and You don't miss a thing Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh, You know me.... You memorize me <--- listen while you read;) Ever have one of those days you seem to question everything? Today was one of those days. " What am I doing? Why did I leave that gig? I know it wasnt what I was called to, but it would have been better than this or where Im at currently..." Actually, funny enough though, it started out as one of those "I'm going to conquer the world" days as there were brilliant options before me, I was looking into. Ha. Having a little fun looking up some ideas on the web, letting your mind spin and creatively ...